Big news and new horizons!

It's been a few weeks since my last post and a lot has happened!

Firstly I took the miles involved in the London to Paris ride into the club 10mile TT and landed a seasons best coming in a whisker under 27minutes. Around this time i also got the results of my degree and discovered all the late nights studying had been rewarded with a first class degree and subsequent permanent job at the hospital,

I then made a visit to the doctor about this persistent knee pain that keeps rearing its head.

He seemed to suggest it was patella femoral tendonitis and has referred me through to the physios and given me some super anti inflamatories with the suggestion that rest would help.

I did a bit of rest, mainly due to the fact I went to Glastonbury music festival and road bikes aren't suitable! On the subject of Glastonbury, a long standing plan came to fruition and the girlfriend has now become the fiancé!  

Like I said. A couple of exciting weeks!

I did contemplate on whether to keep this blog going now that the goal of London to Paris was achieved, and think that I probably will, it gives me a good log of what I have been doing and a few people have commented that they enjoy the read.

Needless to say I need a new target. I'm not sure what that will be yet but I have been looking at some races later on in the season. I just need to decide if I should persist with middle\long distance events or try to get faster at shorter distances. 

As a side project, I have signed up to participate in a university trial in the coming weeks that looks at cycling performance which offers the prospects of some good data and I will put a few posts on that process.

Oh and I also purchased a second hand hardtail mountain bike and will be exploring a bit of the downs very shortly.

New horizons await!

Final day part 2

Day 4 part 2

After arriving in front of the Eiffel Tower, the obligatory handshakes and pats on the back were passed around, before being followed by the posing for team photos.

Unfortunately due to our speed and the sudden appearance of discover adventure (the company) ambition to do anything on time, we arrived 30 minutes before the girlfriend and the captains wife. 

After a short period however two figures were spotted pushing through the crowd to finally join in the celebrations.

The rest of the evening was spent enjoying some dinner in the city before taking an open roof bus tour in the Paris sunshine.

Then regretfully, it was time for the green army to reorganise. 7 members left the captain with two lieutenants and four new recruits to continue the journey onwards to Geneva.

With such good riding in the previous days, the departing riders left with dreams of continuing the journey onwards. 

With over £30,000raised for a number of different causes, the green army have ridden over cobbles, through driving rain, up steep inclines and down sweeping descents.

There were gusty headwinds, ghost like villages, barking dogs, punctures and a few falls, and not to mention a few pints drank!

I for one thoroughly enjoyed the ride, and depart with fantastic memories, a small Eiffel Tower, new pals and a slightly sore under carriage!

The desire to ride my bike burns brighter than ever, and don't shout it loud but whispers of a Paris-Genova-Nice attempt are passing quietly among the team. We shall see!

As I head back to England, 6 members of the green army head onwards to Geneva. Good luck guys and I honestly can say I wish I was there!

Day 4

Day 4 compeigne to Paris (pt 1)

Apologies for the late post, the arrival into Paris was combined with the absence of any phone battery or time to sit and actually write an update. As a result this post is written as I sit on the Eurostar heading home.

Day 4 started very similar to the other days with one exception: waterproof jackets were stashed away and the sun cream was applied!

Due to the relatively (60miles) short distance left to travel, the company allowed us to choose our own start time. Some of the members of the green army decided to head off a bit earlier while others, me included, decided a little extra in bed was deserved and that we could get a decent pace going to make the time up.

The route started on a fast road out of the town allowing us to put the hammer down a bit and make up the time. Although we did get a decent pace going (16mph), the combination of the previous days miles, the previous evenings beers and a strong headwind meant that it was hard going. 

The water stop arrived just 12 miles in, and after the mandatory pee, drink and consumption of chocolate we were quickly on our way again.

The next section was spent on near dead straight roads with rolling hills meaning that the team were able to have a decent blast until lunch. Again the only problem was the headwind. This section included only a few villages, some of which included the fabled 'pave'. We encountered one stretch in particular at the bottom of a descent when the speeds were high and the resulting vibrations pretty epic!

In fact, The vibrations were sufficiently strong enough to dislodge a spare jacket that Mr. Hutton had stowed in his shirt pocket into his rear wheel! After picking himself up after his emergency stop and close viewing of the offending cobbles, the green army marched on!

One other section of pave did allow for the quote of the day to be heard from a local rider heading in the opposite direction. After he had just crossed the section and just before we approached, provided the warning of 'bonjour! Le Pave! Boom Boom Boom'. All the while grinning from ear to ear!

Lunch was taken outside a local swimming pool at around 30miles. Again we were served the usual fare of pasta, mushrooms and cheese and again we were off for the final ascent into Paris.

If we were wondering where all of the French population were hiding when riding through the countryside, we were soon to find them. The next 20 miles were spent going through little suburbs separated by stretches of a dual carridgeway. Helpfully the roads generally had a bike path running alongside them, however rather unhelpfully they were littered with stones, rubbish and all sorts of other things. 

After the proclamation that the cycle path was the best place to travel, the green army member Errol very quickly discovered a nail in his tyre, so much for that then!

I wasn't actually present at this, as shortly before captain bob had decided that he wanted to up the pace and had hit the front of the group.  A few others went with him, myself and Steve included, and after a bit of tooing and frooing I took the lead (aiming for the green army maillot jaune) with a wheel just in my slipstream. 

With a little compotition, the pace increased again, until my surprise, I realised that it was neither cpn' bob or Mr Hutton but a random chap on the ride. After a brief chat I looked around to see where the group was and with no one in sight, decided to push on with the other rider.

Figuring that two riders together were better than individuals apart, I followed his lead (he seemed to know where he was going) and the pace remained high and we were quickly flying through suburbs.

That was until he spied two of his compatriots outside a cafe, and decided to abandon me in search for some refreshment! 

At this point I had two options, to wait for the green army in a very dubious looking suburb of Paris or to go alone.

So off I went! And I must say some of the next 10miles of riding was some of the most exciting of the trip.

The route was marked with orange arrows through the suburbs and resembled more of a city criterium race with twists and turns. With the roads fairly empty, I blitzed through the streets with the blood flowing! 

I managed to catch a group of girls at a set of traffic lights and was ushered ahead before catching a group of rapha clad guys on the outskirts of the city centre.

With this group of quick riders and the mentality of safety in numbers, we kept the pace up over the parisian cobbles and into the busier streets for about 2 miles before reaching the meeting point. Absolutely fabulous riding!

After a coke and regroup in the sunshine of a local park, the group departed en mass for the final push towards the Eiffel Tower.

Due to the traffic and the desire to ride together, the pace was easy over the final couple of miles allowing us to fully take in the scenery. 

And what scenery! After successfully negotiating the traffic at the arc de triumph (with the mindset of colin mcrae 'if in doubt go flat out!' Sorry mum! ) we coasted down the champs élysées before turning towards the Eiffel Tower.

Truly the stuff of dreams!

The green army amassed just before tower and as one finished at the head of the peloton. Job done!

Day 4

Day 4 compeigne to Paris (pt 1)

Apologies for the late post, the arrival into Paris was combined with the absence of any phone battery or time to sit and actually write an update. As a result this post is written as I sit on the Eurostar heading home.

Day 4 started very similar to the other days with one exception: waterproof jackets were stashed away and the sun cream was applied!

Due to the relatively (60miles) short distance left to travel, the company allowed us to choose our own start time. Some of the members of the green army decided to head off a bit earlier while others, me included, decided a little extra in bed was deserved and that we could get a decent pace going to make the time up.

The route started on a fast road out of the town allowing us to put the hammer down a bit and make up the time. Although we did get a decent pace going (16mph), the combination of the previous days miles, the previous evenings beers and a strong headwind meant that it was hard going. 

The water stop arrived just 12 miles in, and after the mandatory pee, drink and consumption of chocolate we were quickly on our way again.

The next section was spent on near dead straight roads with rolling hills meaning that the team were able to have a decent blast until lunch. Again the only problem was the headwind. This section included only a few villages, some of which included the fabled 'pave'. We encountered one stretch in particular at the bottom of a descent when the speeds were high and the resulting vibrations pretty epic!

In fact, The vibrations were sufficiently strong enough to dislodge a spare jacket that Mr. Hutton had stowed in his shirt pocket into his rear wheel! After picking himself up after his emergency stop and close viewing of the offending cobbles, the green army marched on!

One other section of pave did allow for the quote of the day to be heard from a local rider heading in the opposite direction. After he had just crossed the section and just before we approached, provided the warning of 'bonjour! Le Pave! Boom Boom Boom'. All the while grinning from ear to ear!

Lunch was taken outside a local swimming pool at around 30miles. Again we were served the usual fare of pasta, mushrooms and cheese and again we were off for the final ascent into Paris.

If we were wondering where all of the French population were hiding when riding through the countryside, we were soon to find them. The next 20 miles were spent going through little suburbs separated by stretches of a dual carridgeway. Helpfully the roads generally had a bike path running alongside them, however rather unhelpfully they were littered with stones, rubbish and all sorts of other things. 

After the proclamation that the cycle path was the best place to travel, the green army member Errol very quickly discovered a nail in his tyre, so much for that then!

I wasn't actually present at this, as shortly before captain bob had decided that he wanted to up the pace and had hit the front of the group.  A few others went with him, myself and Steve included, and after a bit of tooing and frooing I took the lead (aiming for the green army maillot jaune) with a wheel just in my slipstream. 

With a little compotition, the pace increased again, until my surprise, I realised that it was neither cpn' bob or Mr Hutton but a random chap on the ride. After a brief chat I looked around to see where the group was and with no one in sight, decided to push on with the other rider.

Figuring that two riders together were better than individuals apart, I followed his lead (he seemed to know where he was going) and the pace remained high and we were quickly flying through suburbs.

That was until he spied two of his compatriots outside a cafe, and decided to abandon me in search for some refreshment! 

At this point I had two options, to wait for the green army in a very dubious looking suburb of Paris or to go alone.

So off I went! And I must say some of the next 10miles of riding was some of the most exciting of the trip.

The route was marked with orange arrows through the suburbs and resembled more of a city criterium race with twists and turns. With the roads fairly empty, I blitzed through the streets with the blood flowing! 

I managed to catch a group of girls at a set of traffic lights and was ushered ahead before catching a group of rapha clad guys on the outskirts of the city centre.

With this group of quick riders and the mentality of safety in numbers, we kept the pace up over the parisian cobbles and into the busier streets for about 2 miles before reaching the meeting point. Absolutely fabulous riding!

After a coke and regroup in the sunshine of a local park, the group departed en mass for the final push towards the Eiffel Tower.

Due to the traffic and the desire to ride together, the pace was easy over the final couple of miles allowing us to fully take in the scenery. 

And what scenery! After successfully negotiating the traffic at the arc de triumph (with the mindset of colin mcrae 'if in doubt go flat out!' Sorry mum! ) we coasted down the champs élysées before turning towards the Eiffel Tower.

Truly the stuff of dreams!

The green army amassed just before tower and as one finished at the head of the peloton. Job done!

Day 3 : arras to compiegne

Day 3. And the group is starting to look like it. There were a few injuries dotted around the breakfast hall, it would appear that a number of riders succumbed to the gusty winds on the skippy descends yesterday. Most notably was one girl who now resembles a boxer rather than a cyclist! Despite her best intentions and turning up in full cycle gear in the breakfast hall, the company decided that it was better if she rested today, primarily due to the swelling on her face meaning that she couldn't open her left eye!

It's not just the riders suffering, our bikes took a beating yesterday and I started the day with a flat tyre. Not the best start but after identifying and removing the offending piece of flint, a new inner tube was fitted and finally made the grand depart.

The first 20miles were a bit uncomfortable and my quads in particular were a bit stiff and reluctant to start moving. Any decent Progress was further hampered with another puncture- the second of the day! Again the offending flint was removed and were back on our way to the first water stop.

Judging by the amount of people at the roadside, I think the French roads can be given negative scores today, I think the only people happy were the bike mechanics who were selling inner tubes by the bucketload (I myself bought some, to replace the two spares I had already used).

The first waster stop was pretty impressive as it took place at battle of the Somme war memorial. But this was no normal memorial, it was absolutely enormous. What made it more outstanding was the fact that when you approached it it became obvious that there was some writing on the stone- 72000 names of british soldiers who died during the battle. For those more interested; and I encourage every one to have a look, the name of the memorial was thiepvall.

This was also the sight of an interesting method used to cut a grass verge. In answer to the question of how many French people it takes, the answer is three!

This rest stop seemed to loosen the legs slightly and a few of the green army began to feel good. Steve had mentioned at dinner the previous night that he fancied a blast today so with the sun shining and empty roads four of us formed a chain gang and cranked up the pace before lunch.

After lunch, the green army left on mass with the intention of an easy cycle for the rest of the day. However after just three miles a challenge was muttered and kingy, steve and myself were off again. 

I'm not sure what they put in the meatballs but I think it was the same stuff contador was was eating a few years ago (before the drug ban) because we were flying. Again in chain gang formation we were eating up the miles and very quickly arrived at the next water point 20miles later- minutes behind the support crew who were disappointed that they couldn't chill out for a while!

Again for the second time I the day, the company chose a perfect rest stop which was directly next to a fishing lake. Although il not sure the fisherman was too impressed with a load of cyclists spoiling his prospects! 

After the previous couple of stints spent blasting through the French countryside we then did keep in a group and covered the remaining 20ish miles at a relatively sensible pace. 

It would seem however that my pursuit of the maillot Jaune is under threat from a fellow team member, who decided to use some underhand tactics and bumped wheels while causally cycling along. 

Staying upright, a lance stare was delivered to the offending rider, apologies offered and accepted and the green army were in peace again!

20 miles later and the days journey is complete. Off to the bar!

Day 2 - Calais to Arras

Today was a day of two halves. The first half of the day featured strong winds whilst the second had light winds and rain.

The day started well (despite captain bobs phone resetting its clock and waking us an hour early) with a few panna chocolates for breakfast before leaving the hotel at 8ish. 

Some easy riding was ordered for the first couple of miles to ease the various aches and pains into the days activity. A short encounter with the notorious pave ensued, with no obvious casualties and just a bit of testing of the bike skills.

The route was described to us as undulating with rolling hills, I'm not sure on whose advice this was given as some of the inclines were short an sharp whilst others were long and gradual.

The route took us very much away from the beaten track, mostly on back roads and through empty villages with very little in the way of traffic. 

20miles brought about the first drinks stop, and food was gratefully received as a few pastries don't seem to have the same effect as porridge! 

The route then headed through much the same terrain as before, with the green army becoming spread out as some were cranking the pace and some nursing injuries from a few falls yesterday.

Like Wiggo in the giro, people's descending skills were tested today with some sweeping valleys. These were made all the more exciting with the addition of a gusty crosswind 

Lunch arrived at 49miles, and took place in a field with very little in the shape of shelter. Remarkably another team member (kingy) and myself arrived 2nd and 3rd to the lunch out of the peloton and set about consuming calories with gusto. Eventually lunch proper was served and just as we found a spot to enjoy our fare, the rain started falling. 

Covered as best we could by a tree the green army ate in fairly high spirits despite the grim realisation that it was going to be a testing afternoon.

Lunch taking place at 49miles meant that we had approximately 30 miles to go to the hotel, and despite starting together the team quickly found ourselves separating as individuals increased the pace to reach the hotel in the shortest time possible. 

At this time I found myself hitting it fairly hard as there is not much fun in cycling any amount of distance in the driving lane and soon found myself on my own. With kingy ahead and captain bob just behind I set into trying to catch the former (mainly because I had no glasses and the signs in the town may warrant some reading!). 

Despite pushing it hard I was overtaken by our mechanic, who on his day off from staffing the support car, was on roaming aid duty. For most mechanics this would be a nightmare but unlike most mechanics he is a semi pro cyclists and has the speed to match the status! It was truly a blink and you miss it!

Eventually at the next water stop a few of the team caught up with each other, ate a bit of fuel and set out together in seek of the hotel with very few directions to assist! (The mayor won't allow the company to put up signs in the town)

This is not suntan!

Tired, cold and wet we finally arrived, ready for a hot shower, dinner and a few beers. Day 2 done!

Things I saw today:

No French people at all (seriously where are they)

A house decorated with hub caps

Multiple cows

A steam roller 

Rain

As a side note I didn't notice that my deep freeze spray and deodorant have very similiar cans. So with stinging underarms and a nice smelling knee I heading to the bar! 

Day 2 plan

Day 1, London to Calais

So the first day is nearly over, 78miles of the English countryside completed in the glorious sunshine (I wish!)

The day started chilly on black Heath common (a 5am wake up call) and was followed by 16 miles escaping the nightmare that is London rush hour traffic. Once escaped we headed out into the quieter country lanes, and the green army regrouped after the too frequent traffic lights and a small and headed in convoy towards the white cliffs of Dover. 

The route was mainly undulating with a few Kentish hills chucked in to sort the men from the boys. All was going smoothly until I passed an unfortunate chap called Gary who had his bike upside down trying to refit his chain, after briefly stopping to complete this task I lifted his bike only to find a flat front tyre. On questioning it was revealed not only did he not know how to change a flat, he possessed no spare tube, pump or tyre leavers. So continuing in the Good Samaritan role I set to work!

I must say I don't think I could have done it quicker and then left Gary to put the peddle to the metal to catch the group. 

We reconvened as a team just outside Dover and as we arrived with an hour to spare headed to the local watering hole for a pint of the finest. Exactly one hour later we received a phone call enquiring as to where we are and to get outsells to the port ASAP. Considering I write this siting in the port waiting to board, it was well worth the rush!?

All that follows today is to get some dinner on the ferry and then a 5mile journey to the hotel. I'm sure a few more recovery beverages will be supped before bedtime!

All in all a good but tough first day. The knee is aching but manageable. We met an interesting few couple of characters, one of which is a chap beginning a round the world trip on a bike. The rain is drizzling but the banter is flying. 

For those that haven't already head to our justgiving page and donate. We are checking it throughout the day and it all donations do provide us a spur up those hills!

The evening of the night before

With only one night left before the ride I have arrived in the hotel in London ready for the trip tomorrow. In fact the cycling itself now seems rather insignificant in comparison to the journey up; it appears London commuters do not appreciate the presence of a road bike on their trains at 530. Oh well!

After arrival and the dispatching I the bike into a safe room, we checked into our room and were told to be up at 5 sharp in time for breakfast at 530. It is here I will say that the website lulled us into this early start with the later time of 6am to arose ready for a departure of 730! Cheeky buggers!

With rain in the air it is waterproofs that are left out for the morning. And after a bit of carb loading in the form of a few beverages and a pasta dish I'm off to bed. Ready for the departure anon!

The Time Has Come!

The time has come!

All the training has now ended and I am now packed (well nearly) and ready to head up to London tomorrow.

The Uniform of the Green Army

As per the marathon build up it has not all been smooth sailing and the pesky knee injury has threatened to reappear in recent weeks. As soon as it began rearing its head I started dialling back the miles and settled on a few rides per week.

That was the plan, at least until my car went for its MOT and then its subsequent grave! This meant that just 7 days before we were due to leave London I faced a week of commuting on the bike and covering 100+ miles rather than the 30-50 miles I had planned.

Fortunately, I picked up my shiny new Mini on the Friday, allowing me 4 days of no cycling (and 4 days of antisocial driving) before I head up to London tomorrow.

So bags are packed, tyres pumped and Euros purchased. Hopefully this sunshine continues and the waterproofs can stay in their bags. Although if the pollen count can lower over the next week that would also be nice, hayfever and cycling through the countryside do not make good bed fellows!

I am aiming to blog whilst away, but this does depend on wifi access. Im not too keen on bankrupting myself paying astronomical roaming costs to connect to the internet!

The route we are following can be found at: https://www.discoveradventure.com/userfiles/image/Slideshow%20pdfs%20-%20web/Open%20London%20to%20Paris%20Cycle.pdf

On first glance it would appear that the main time pressure is on getting to the ferry on time on the first day. This is rewarded with dinner whilst we cross, a lovely idea, providing that you don’t suffer from sea sickness! 

Cycling Tourettes

Im better…well hopefully!

Which is good news as the ride is fast approaching; in fact I shall be tucked up in bed (not in the bar, honest) in a French hotel in exactly two weeks time having completed the first day of the challenge.

After taking a few days off training due to being sick and bed/sofa bound at the tail end of last week, I had planned to return to the bike on the Bank Holiday Monday. However after spending the morning tidying the house (no cleaning when sick) and a few beers at a friends BBQ, this idea was curtailed fairly quickly

and I wisely took the decision to have a doze on the sofa rather than wobble about the Sussex country lanes.

 In retrospect, the extra day recovery probably actually helped, and I returned to the bike on the daily commute on Tuesday morning.

Despite the overcast start to the day, the sunshine appeared briefly in the afternoon and was timed perfectly for a longer ride home. So instead of the normal route home, I chose to seek a few hills rather than a flatter course and headed for the South Downs and coastal views before heading inwards and homewards on the country lanes.

I have been commuting to work for just over 4 years now, and 2 years ago the decision to move out of town resulted in an increase in the distance from a very nice- get out of bed at 8 - 1.5 miles to a 11 mile cycle lycra clad blast.

I’m fortunate in that my commute is mostly through minor roads and the country, there is in fact an alternative route which is shorter but involves a dual carriage way and I actively avoid it.

Despite this avoidance of the main road (which is lovely and smooth due to recent road works), I do encounter the odd car driver who obviously decides that they own the road and like to beep/ cut corners/ gesture at me for have the audacity to cycle to work.

Sadly it would appear that these incidents are becoming more frequent. Notable incidents include a pick up truck just beeped at me, for no obvious reason than that I was on the bike!? And a lady who decided to undertake me…on a roundabout ….when I was turning right – wonderful driving.

Normally I try to not be confrontational and just ignore these idiot drivers, however there is the odd occasion that I am shocked enough that a few remarks might slip out. One such incident was the man in the van who decided to cut across my path on my commute home today.

For some reason he had waited until the road was clear and I was about 10m away before he pulled across my path. Almost instantaneously I let rip with a short tirade that would have not been out of place in a Tarentino film. Complete with arm gestures.

Im not sure if he noticed my reaction, or my presence at all. But it made me feel better. And that’s what matters!

NB: For all the car drivers out there, I also drive a car, and I am aware that there are a number of idiot cyclists, in fact I gave a bit of ‘advice’ to a guy who decided to cycle the wrong way round a roundabout outside work just the other day!

Stash and Sickness

It’s been almost two weeks since my last blog and on my last post I stated that I had begun spending all of my newly found free time on the bike and in the pool. Whilst this carried on into the next week, life and specifically work decided I was having too much fun and that it would bring a stop to my new freedom.

To begin with, work ramped up in both intensity and duration for the week; this was due to our staff rate dropping by 3/5ths over 7 days and the workload increasing by 50%. This meant we had literally the bare minimum staffing and we were pretty much on full gas all week. These two combined to make a pretty stressful and knackering week, meaning that after work exercise was very unappetising.

I did manage however, to keep some motivation and visited the pool a few times before work in the week, and squeezed in a longer cycle home one night to include a few hills.

I also purchased some stash from my local cycling club. For those uninitiated in sport, Stash is the real reason we play, not for medals, not for glory and not for ‘love of the game’. Stash is the reason Mr. D Beckham has travelled round the world playing for different clubs. Stash is what drives grown men to don their football boots and socks for no reason when watching their 8-year-old play Sunday football.

Stash is Club Kit.

And it took me a full 3 weeks since joining the club to invest in matching shirt and shorts. Lovely.

Despite my best intentions of racing the weekly club TT in my newly acquired stash (I even pre packed everything prior to going to work!), by the time Thursday arrived I was pretty much smashed and it only took the slightest suggestion before I found myself having a refreshing pint in the local pub garden.

The weekend following was always going to be a write off in terms of training; it was the Girlfriends birthday on the Saturday and my annual hockey reunion (read: not much hockey and lots of drinking). In order to score some brownie points, Friday’s activity involved dinner, a movie and the gifting of some birthday sunglasses resulting in permission to go out and play on the Saturday.

Needless to say, I was slightly fragile on Sunday and despite the sunshine, was barely able to walk a mile never mind balance on a bike.

The following Monday, 2 of our missing 3/5ths returned to work and inexplicably, the workload dropped by 50% (typical) meaning that finally I could get back to training.

Apart from the sickness that is.

As I am male, I would like you to know how much I was suffering. And more importantly, I want your sympathy!

It would appear that I no longer have the recuperation of a vampire/Khan from the new Star Trek Film/ my university days, and had developed a minor head cold on the Monday. Perhaps wisely I decided to skip swimming to avoid making things worse/ giving everyone else the germs. Feeling slightly better, I commuted to work on the Tuesday only to develop a tight chest.

Using the (very few) benefits of working in healthcare, I had a chat to a doctor who after a quick examination confirmed I wasn’t having a) a heart attack, b) a collapsed lung, c) a broken rib or d) a pnumeothorax and it was more likely to be a minor bug, so, I got on the bike and peddled through treacle all the way home (at least that’s what it felt like).

Clearly optimistic, I decided that a decent sleep would cure all and headed into work the next day hopeful that I would get a light jog in after work before setting the world alight with my TT abilities the next day?!

How I was wrong. And it became apparent, not with a light jog, but a Usain Bolt like sprint. To the toilet. After loosing what felt like half of the Pacific Ocean, I politely informed my boss of the events and rather quickly headed home.

The next two days were spent moping around the house with a headache resistant to all medication and a body that ached like I had lost a fight with a polar bear.

So after sleeping like a zombie/ completing Tomb Raider / sitting through Domino (terrible, terrible film) I felt slightly better and set about doing something constructive. I watched the footage of the Brighton marathon and found screen shots of myself.

That’s right. Im a TV star.

Me, centerpiece (with a white shirt)

Again, centerpiece, (white strip down the trouser leg)